Cunning Conspiracy
Steven was kind enough to send me a link to this news article. It seems that a street hustler in New York City fired on police officers, but his gun jammed because he was holding it sideways.
What do you call that, when someone holds a gun sideways? Depends on who you talk to. Gangster hold. Rapper hold. Gangsta grip. I just call it moron, as in “He’s holding that gun like a moron!”
What is the problem with gripping the firearm like that? Besides the fact that such a hold renders the sights useless so accuracy goes way down, it also increases the chance of a malfunction. As the suspect mentioned in the news item found out.
The popularity of this odd gun gripping technique is due to the fact that untrained criminals use it because they think it makes them look more dangerous, aggressive, and cool. Since they never figured out how to aim a handgun anyway, it hardly matters if they ignore the basics of marksmenship. Rap stars and actors in movies have spread the meme by aping the low-rent criminals they portray in the media.
But, oddly enough, I have heard that this is actually the most successful disinformation campaign in all of history!
Fellow firearm enthusiasts have confided to me that the popularity of the moron hold is due to an unprecedented collaboration between Hollywood, the music industry, and police forces all across the nation. This effort, which has been ongoing for a quarter of a century, is carefully designed to reduce police casualties when facing down armed and violent criminals. If the bad guys don’t know how to use a gun, they won’t be able to hit much.
And why would they think this? True believers point out that it would take the truly idiotic, a moron of the first water, to even try and fire a handgun from a sideways hold. Since not all criminals can be that stupid, then there has to be a conspiracy!
I think just about anyone who has worked a law enforcement job will attest that the conspiracy-mongers are overstating the intelligence of common criminals. Most probably favor the moron hold because they really are morons.
But if there really was a conspiracy like the one outlined above, then it would be larger and more successful than the First United States Army Group.
December 13th, 2009 at 3:31 am
It’s really a good thing this particular guy loused up. That MAC-10 he was using had a 30-round clip and he could have emptied it if the gun hadn’t jammed. He wasn’t much of a shot; the two rounds he did fire took out a storefront window and the window of a passing car. It’s anyone’s guess how many innocent bystanders he might have hit when he was hosing in the general direction of the cop who was chasing him.
I’m really glad we didn’t find out.
December 13th, 2009 at 3:47 am
Me, too!
December 13th, 2009 at 2:44 pm
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ….
We started making jokes about Hollywood helping out cops by promoting that sideways hold back on 1992 on USENET, specifically in or.guns . Don’t know if it originated there, of if someone just imported the joke to the newsgroup.
The traction these kind of things get is just amazing.
Please don’t correct the Hollyweird crowd … they really are saving cops lives here, unwittingly or not.
December 14th, 2009 at 1:18 am
I don’t think it would have mattered *how* he held the gun… those MAC-10s are notorious jam-o-matics. But maybe the conspiracy extends to the types of guns, and street thugs care more about image than reliability in their firearms.
December 14th, 2009 at 11:06 am
The “gangsta” grip is a prime example of successful, absolutely intentional “disinformation” seeded into our pop culture by “technical advisors” working for Hollywood, so that the gang bangers in da hood who learn their shooting technique from watching TV won’t learn anything really useful. Monkey-see, monkey-do… Ain’t it cool?
December 14th, 2009 at 11:59 am
I was a cavalry soldier in the U.S. Army. There was once a time when we had to hold our M-16 sideways. One time only. Full M.O.P.P. gear, nightfire with gas mask. Holding the weapon that way allowed you to use your sights when wearing the mask. Those cannisters really don’t allow you to place your cheek on the stock. I havn’t held a weapon in that fashion since then.
December 14th, 2009 at 6:15 pm
Maybe he should have had a set of HoMeBoY NyTe-SyTeS
http://i81.servimg.com/u/f81/13/91/16/85/x7qfp10.jpg
December 16th, 2009 at 4:36 pm
I test fire all my semi-auto guns in at least four orientations. 12, 3, 6 & 9 o’clock to insure there are no feed or ejection problems. I get some real funny looks when I’ve done that on a public range.
December 18th, 2009 at 11:52 am
[...] torso-sized at a distance of greater than three feet. (And that’s not an exaggeration.) From Hell in a Handbasket. The popularity of this odd gun gripping technique is due to the fact that untrained criminals use [...]
December 18th, 2009 at 5:08 pm
[...] Ha ha. What a jackass. Via Rummel. [...]
December 19th, 2009 at 7:56 am
I served with a guy with a fairly…colorful background. He once told me that the hold is specifically designed to be inaccurate.
See, most gangsters don’t carry guns as self-defence weapons, but as status symbols. Bullets usually aren’t sent downrange to kill people, but to intimidate. By minimizing accuracy you also minimize the chances of actually killing someone, which would bring retribution and the possiblity of a very unprofitable war.
December 24th, 2009 at 4:38 pm
Bobby: That is SOP for firing an AK prone … you can’t get all the way down to the ground if you hold an AK vertically.
( here is an Oleg Volk photo of someone doing it Warsaw-Pact spec:
http://olegvolk.net/gallery/d/35575-2/james_AK47_8511.jpg )
This is also the reason old steel 20 round AR magazines are still very popular … you don’t have to dig a hole for the mag.
January 14th, 2010 at 7:51 am
[...] mentioned the “Gangster Hold” way of gripping a firearm here in the past. This is where the gun is held sideways in an effort to look more cool or [...]