What If “The Call Of Cthulhu” Was Written By Dr. Seuss?

November 24th, 2017

 

“That is not dead which can eternal lie,
And with strange aeons even death may die.”
H.P Lovecraft

Knifely Benediction

November 23rd, 2017

A little something to carve the turkey.

A notation knife, with music and song etched into the blade, circa 1500 CE or so.  One side contains the grace, while the other side has a song of thanks.

The knife pictured above is housed at the Victoria and Albert Museum in the great city of London.  Click this link to be taken to the V&A website page that talks about the knife.  You can even listen to modern reproductions of the songs, kind of like listening to an echo from half millennium ago.

Happy Thanksgiving!

November 23rd, 2017

I have a special tradition for this holiday.  I always have a good dinner, as most everyone does, but I also watch Dredd (2012).

A dystopian crime drama, soaked with violence and despair, instead of a feel-good film that uplifts the spirit?  There are a few reasons for this.

I worked two jobs during the 1980’s, and would rent videos for the few days I had any free time.  There were many nights I would watch cheap movies featuring forgettable action heroes that were filmed on a shoestring.  Although Dredd had a respectable amount of money in the budget, and it looks pretty good, the gritty and hyper-realistic tone of the film reminds me strongly of all of those direct to video offerings where everyone involved tried to do their best with what they had.

Another reason is that it is a pretty good film!  Entertaining, and the characters are true to the source material.  None of which can be said of the first effort to bring the character to the big screen.

The last reason is that I am really, really thankful that I don’t live in such a world as that depicted in the movie.  And isn’t giving thanks what the holiday is all about?

I’ve Had To Deal With Far Too Many People Like This

November 23rd, 2017

Fascinating story about a crazy cat lady who likes to mail bombs to the Texas governor and President Obama. (Hat tip to Glenn.)

Click that first link above and fill your eyeholes with crazy.

Julia Poff has had a very hard life.

She was fired from her job at a law firm, but they fired her for stealing money from a client.  She set up a fund where kind-hearted people could donate clothing and money to a widowed father and young child after Hurricane Harvey, and she kept the money for herself.  She was denied assistance through SNAP, the Federal program that replaced the old food stamps, but only because she lied to them about her financial circumstance.  She has been evicted from her residence seven times in the past for non-payment of rent.  This pissed her off so much that she poured liquid concrete down the drains, stuffed the toilets with potatoes so they couldn’t flush, and locked her dogs inside and refused to let them out so they would piss and crap all over the place.

Bankruptcy court has repeatedly denied her requests to have her debts discharged, but only because she lied to them the same way she lied to SNAP.  It appears that she was so hostile during the court proceedings that extra security was on hand whenever she was scheduled to appear at the court house.  She is in trouble with the IRS, but only because she has not reported income.  She has been convicted of misdemeanor theft and state felony fraud, both times receiving probation instead of jail time, but has refused to abide by the terms of the probation so it has been either revoked or amended.  Her application for Social Security benefits, probably disability benefits because they are easiest to get, was denied because she didn’t qualify for them.

But the real kicker is that she is being investigated by the FBI.  Why?  Because in 2016 she mailed bombs to President Obama, a Social Security administration building in Maryland, and Texas state governor Greg Abbott.

The Feds are pretty good about security, and their screening procedures intercepted the bombs before anyone was hurt.  But Governor Abbott opens his own mail, or at least he did.  He only managed to escape serious injury and possible death from the package bomb because he “did not open it as designed“, which probably means he used a knife to cut the package open on the side instead of the ends.  Something tells me there is  a recently installed X-ray machine in the Governor’s mansion!

How did they catch her?  What evidence is there that Ms. Poff is the terrorist who mailed these bombs in an attempt to take innocent lives?

Well, they found cat hair stuck under labels of the packages sent to both Governor Abbott and President Obama, and the cat hair matches samples taken from cats owned by Ms. Poff.  She seems to be a crazy cat lady who also keeps a few dogs on hand in case she needs to soak down her apartment with extra urine and feces.

A cell phone was used as an ignition device in the bomb sent to President Obama, and the cell phone belongs to Ms. Poff.  I suppose she figured it would be blown up real good, and the FBI crime lab would never be able to trace it back to her!

The cardboard box that contained the bomb mailed to Governor Abbott had an older mailing label still affixed, a mailing label that was addressed to Ms. Poff.  She never thought anyone would be able to trace it back to her because she had used a permanent marker to color over the name and address!

What a criminal mastermind we have here!

She is currently 46 years old.  I’m pretty sure that she is going to be a guest of the grey bar hotel for a few decades.  If she is lucky, her public defender will be willing to take the extra effort to have her remanded to a mental institution to serve out her sentence.  Because, let’s face it, she might not qualify for Social Security benefits, but she certainly qualifies for that!

I said before that Ms. Poff has had a hard life.  One of the things I didn’t bother to mention earlier is that all of her woes is entirely her fault!

 

Shooting Chains

November 20th, 2017

Ever hear of chain shot?

Clearly, it is a couple of cannon balls connected by a chain.  I mean, DUH!

It was used mainly during the great Age of Sail.

The idea was to load that bad boy in a cannon, and use it to chop up the rigging.  It would act as a giant buzzsaw, ripping through sails, masts and ropes.

It also did a pretty good job against enemy combatants.

The problem was that cannons, like any gun, can only be loaded with so much propellant before going kaboom.  Double cannon balls, with a length of chain, would be moving significantly slower when fired than a single cannon ball.  This meant that the range was severely curtailed, and one would have to get really, really close to some extremely angry strangers before letting loose with the noisy balm that was sure to calm them down.

So what to do?

A long time reader sent me a link to an interesting site that discusses a rather curios cannon.  (Hi, Greg!)  It seems that a double barrelled cannon is on display in Athens, Georgia that was designed to fire chain shot.

One cannon ball per barrel, and the muzzle velocity will be nice and high.  No reduction in potential range as long as the chain or balls don’t hit anything prematurely.

The cannon pictured above was made in 1862, but it was hardly a new idea at the time.  I came across another existing example that was sold at auction in 2015 which dated from 1848.

Pretty interesting stuff!  Click on some links, the text isn’t very long, probably because such cannon didn’t play a very significant role in warfare.  And let me give a note of thanks to Greg for the heads up!

Gun Geekery At Its Finest!

November 20th, 2017

I have an interest in history.  Not so much HISTORY!, the really huge trends and events that change the human conditions on a global scale.  Instead I like the small stuff, the nitty gritty, individuals down in the dirt getting their hands dirty to make things happen.

Considering the nature of this blog, I would like to bring your attention to a video blog called C@Rsenal (pronounced “See-Arsenal”).  It is exhaustively researched, not only tracing the evolution of gun design but also presenting the human side of things.  As there is money to be made in firearms, like there is in any other mechanical tool that may see widespread use, the people involved in designing and marketing the devices tend to have some rather dramatic personality clashes.

Case in point is the episode where the Lewis gun is discussed.

(Picture source.)

For those of you who are not familiar with the design, the Lewis gun is considered by many to be the very best British light machine gun that was used in the first World War.  In fact, it is probably the very best light machine gun used in that war, British or otherwise.  So why did a gun that was developed by extremely patriotic Americans used extensively by the British, and almost completely ignored by the American government?  For that you will have to watch the video.

The first thing you will note is the length of the video.  Close to an hour and a half!  There are movies that aren’t as long!

Well, like I said, it is chock full of detail.  If you find the subject to be interesting, then you are someone who will appreciate the effort made to ferret out all of the details, and bring them to us.  If this just seems boring to you, and I don’t blame anyone who might have that opinion, then please skip the videos for fare that you will find more rewarding.

The episode on the Lewis gun is particularly lengthy, and most of the videos at C@Rsenal are about half the running time.  The authors of the channel are concentrating on arms used during WWI, and it is great resource if you are interested in building a collection of historical arms from that period.

James says check it out!

Household Tip

November 4th, 2017

If you should find yourself out of insecticide and your home is assailed by bees ….

… then you should know that Formula 409 drops them like a bullet to the head!

Umm!  Lemon scented!

Signs Of A Misspent Youth

October 25th, 2017

That isn’t a rule book or prepackaged adventure module.  It isn’t even character sheets.  It is the cover for “adventure record sheets”, forms used to keep track of what happened during a dungeon crawl.  You could just do that on a blank piece of paper.

This is how I spent my disposable income before I was old enough to own firearms.  Nowadays I just buy a few boxes of ammo and turn my money into noise down at the range.

Shiny!

A Lot To Feel Good About

October 22nd, 2017

I wrote last month about my first experience firing submachine guns.  Long time reader Fruitbat44 was kind enough to leave a comment.

“I have always wondered if the M3, especially the M3A1, was developed to make us Brits feel good about the Sten.”

What is this Sten of which Fruitbat44 speaks?  It is a submachine gun the the United Kingdom developed and fielded during WWII.

(Picture source.)

In the days leading up to the Second World War, the British Empire was not what it once was.  Not a big surprise, as the First World War had pretty much remade the globe so much that nothing was like it once was.  There was also that worldwide economic depression that made it tough to find the cash to modernize the armed forces.

Still, something had to be done.  Germany was doing a pretty good job of rearming, and they made no secret of the fact that they were going to break the Versailles Treaty.  Just about everyone realized that there was going to be a shooting war sooner or later.

The Sten was a marvel of technological simplicity and streamlined design.  Anything that wasn’t needed to make the gun go bang was left off, except for some rather rudimentary sights so the operator could hit the broad side of a barn.  The majority of the gun was assembled from stamped steel parts, with a minimum of welding, so some guy in his basement hobby workshop could make most of the parts in a few hours.  A properly equipped factory could churn them out at seemingly amazing speed.

Built for efficiency and economy, what did one cost?  £2 in 1941, or $10.00 USD.  This is the equivalent of £80 ($130.00 USD) in todays terms.  Consider that the Thompson submachine gun cost $200.00 USD in 1941, or about $3800.00 when adjusted for inflation.  Give me a Sten any day!

Oh, sure, there were some problems with the design, particularly in 1941 when it was first issued to the troops.  But improvements were made, problems were fixed, and the Sten became a reasonably effective weapon by 1942.

Fruitbat44 mentioned the American M3 submachine gun, which was developed precisely because of the success that the Sten enjoyed as a dirt cheap yet effective weapon of war.  But even with the advantage of building from success, the deployment of the M3 was delayed due to constantly changing design specs.  This was such a problem that the M3 was not issued in significant numbers until the last few months of the war.  Such is the desire by engineers to make what is good enough a whole lot better than it needs to be.

Another black mark for the M3 is that the gun never reached the same level of economy as the Sten, costing about $15.00 USD for each gun.  Keep in mind that the United States was the home of vast automotive factories, some of which produced the M3, yet it was still  more expensive than the British version of an expedient submachine gun.

There is nothing to feel bad about when it comes to the Sten.  It filed the role for which it was intended better than any other mass produced submachine gun during WWII.

What A Flammenschwert!

October 22nd, 2017